I've observed (a) polyamory and monogamy and (b) magic/spirituality in many different contexts. I have a few thoughts on this post, which I thought was interesting:
- The attempt to set this up was ambitious, yes. But the decision to do so was *much* less irrational than it may seem, because everyone involved had specialized social skills that made them more likely to succeed at this arrangement. This may not be obvious to you from inside your social context, but I'm speaking here as someone who is somewhat familiar with your social context and also familiar with numerous cultures outside your social context, and I can attest that in many ways, you were set up for success. The participants were experienced in relevant relationship styles, and had many shared expectations around communication and priorities.
- The "wild magic" frame is not a bad one for the pandemic, in my opinion!
- If a person doesn't set much stock in magic/woo, then just saying it was a psychologically wild time (rather than "wild magic") is also accurate. Because it was such a wild time psychologically and socially, we all had to figure out a lot of stuff on the fly and do so by instinct. A lot of people discovered that things they were doing that had seemed normal and reliable before no longer worked (e.g. the divorce rate went up suddenly). In an environment like that, it was arguably more "rational" to try something unusual that you "had the feeling could work."
What a testament to the fact that just because something is conventional doesn’t make it the best or good or practical. This is a brave and beautiful exploration into the unknown. I love it. Thanks for sharing.
Nobody had any idea how long lockdown was going to last. “Two weeks to flatten the curve,” right? So in some ways it has some very Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt vibes: “You can do anything for ten seconds!” [manic grinning]
I've observed (a) polyamory and monogamy and (b) magic/spirituality in many different contexts. I have a few thoughts on this post, which I thought was interesting:
- The attempt to set this up was ambitious, yes. But the decision to do so was *much* less irrational than it may seem, because everyone involved had specialized social skills that made them more likely to succeed at this arrangement. This may not be obvious to you from inside your social context, but I'm speaking here as someone who is somewhat familiar with your social context and also familiar with numerous cultures outside your social context, and I can attest that in many ways, you were set up for success. The participants were experienced in relevant relationship styles, and had many shared expectations around communication and priorities.
- The "wild magic" frame is not a bad one for the pandemic, in my opinion!
- If a person doesn't set much stock in magic/woo, then just saying it was a psychologically wild time (rather than "wild magic") is also accurate. Because it was such a wild time psychologically and socially, we all had to figure out a lot of stuff on the fly and do so by instinct. A lot of people discovered that things they were doing that had seemed normal and reliable before no longer worked (e.g. the divorce rate went up suddenly). In an environment like that, it was arguably more "rational" to try something unusual that you "had the feeling could work."
Any chance I can just real quick beam you into the past so you can explain all this to my very concerned therapist
What a testament to the fact that just because something is conventional doesn’t make it the best or good or practical. This is a brave and beautiful exploration into the unknown. I love it. Thanks for sharing.
Nobody had any idea how long lockdown was going to last. “Two weeks to flatten the curve,” right? So in some ways it has some very Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt vibes: “You can do anything for ten seconds!” [manic grinning]
This truly is a 'magical' modern love story from magical thinking! Is it really five years ago?